


Tracks in the Snow

by MiddlemistRed



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Character Death, Feels, Grief, Homeworld (Steven Universe), Magic, im bad at tagging, im sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-13
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-06-08 05:09:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6840262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiddlemistRed/pseuds/MiddlemistRed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Moonstone didn't understand why the rebels were so bent on defending one stupid planet and why Homeworld would rather send gem after gem to die rather than give it to them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Faces

**Author's Note:**

> Trying to get back into writing.  
> I would love some constructive criticism to help me with that.  
> This is currently unedited, which will most-likely take a little while to change. I still have to get used to this website. -^-

Moonstone surveyed the latest batch of gems, freshly emerged from the earth below.

"Identify yourselves," Moonstone called out, watching the gems snap to attention at the sound. "Left to right, let's go!"

A large, barrel-chested gem stepped forward, her stiffly set shoulders the only sign of nerves.

"Reporting in, Sard, Facet-9T2L Cut-2DH."

Moonstone glanced over at her Aventurine, who gave her a brisk nod to show she was recording the event.

"Next!"

 

After all the new gems had introduced themselves, Moonstone formed a basic obstacle course to test their strengths and weaknesses. In this batch, there was one sard, two amethysts, one red jasper, and finally a fragile looking chalcedony.

Moonstone's eyes lingered on the chalcedony as it struggled to lifts itself over an obstacle. It was not common that gems came out 'wrong'. While a chalcedony was supposed to be lithe and agile, this one was too small and too thin.

Moonstone frowned at the info-display emanating from her wristband. Homeworld wanted chalcedony to be trained as a soldier. It was a death sentence for the smaller gem, but Homeworld needed every gem it could get to fight the rebels.

Her gaze snapped back to Chalcedony in time to watch the red jasper try to discreetly shove Chalcedony up and over the wall she was struggling on. Chalcedony slipped Jasper a grateful smile before she jogged off to the next obstacle. Moonstone gave a sigh, dismissing the info-display with a wave.

Moonstone watched the rest of the training session with a critical eye. She had been a combat trainer for many years, a teacher many years more.

Her trained eye picked out every time one amethyst favored ranged weapons when they moved on to sparring, every time the red jasper tried to assist her fellow trainees when they struggled, and everytime Chalcedony was unable to complete the task assigned.

Moonstone made occasional comments as she watched, trusting Aventurine to remember them as she watched the recruits.

"Amethyst facet-1D3H cut-7HT shows promise as a ranged troop."

"The red Jasper, facet-7J9C cut-5TC, shows promise as a support troop. I'll have to test her ability with defensive weaponry and her battle awareness."

"Amethyst, facet-3S6A cut-6WC, shows promise with melee weapons, but lacks battle awareness."

"Sard, Facet-9T2L Cut-2DH, shows promise with heavy weaponry, but she needs to work on her speed and footing."

"Chalcedony, Facet-3L6O Cut-9VE, lacks in physical prowess, but shows impressive battle awareness."

 

After the day's training was done and the trainees had gone back to the barracks to rest, Moonstone dispelled the obstacle course.

She sat on the edge of the field and watched as the ice quickly melt and drain into the specially designed floor.

Moonstone turned her head in acknowledgment as Aventurine walked over to stand next to her before sliding her gaze back to the now empty training field. She heard the faint tittering of those little blue snow birds that lived around the base. They had fascinated Moonstone when she had first arrived.

Moonstone tilted her head toward Aventurine, who had not moved from her spot slightly behind her.

"Any new fatalities?"

Aventurine tilted her head to the side, considering her question.

"Two as reported last battle." She answered slowly, eyeing Moonstone carefully.

Moonstone turned to face Aventurine completely.

"Of mine?" She asked, searching Aventurine's face. The way Aventurine's face scrunched up and her eyes darted away gave her the answer.

"The two were yours, there was a total of 13 fatalities in total on our side." Her head tilted again, "5 rebel fatalities as well."

Moonstone turned away, dropping her face into her hands. She knew she shouldn't ask it, but the question tumbled out of her mouth anyway.

"Who?"

"Moon..." Aventurine said, a tired note in her voice.

Moonstone closed her eyes, they went through this in the aftermath of every battle.

"Venny, please."

Aventurine gave a quite sigh before moving to sit next to her.

"Facet-4D9A Cut-2BK and Facet-3J6L Cut-5TN."

A pained noise escaped Moonstone and Aventurine slipped her hand into Moonstone's in an attempt at comfort. Her smaller, chubbier fingers gripping tight at Moonstone's slender ones.

"Bloodstone and Onyx."

Aventurine hummed in confirmation, her eyes finding a spot in the distance to focus on.

"I really thought Onyx might make it." Moon mummered, turning her face further into her palm. Her finger curled into her hair, gripping at it roughly.

She hated this war. Moonstone didn't understand why the rebels were so bent on defending one stupid planet and why Homeworld would rather send gem after gem to die rather than give it to them.

Moonstone dragged her hand down her face, resting heavily on her chin.

"Make an appointment with their division leaders so that I can adjust my training regiment accordingly." Moonstone sighed out.

She pulled her hand from Aventurine's and stood up from their seat, facing her face to not betray the curdling grief in her gut.

Aventurine stood up beside her, laying a hand on Moonstone's arm. Moonstone forced herself to turn and meet Aventurine's gaze, reading the silent question there.

"I'm fine, Venny, I just need to blow off some steam." She reassured her, waving toward the training field.

Aventurine pursed her lips for a moment, looking like she wanted to protest. In the end, she just gave a curt nod and turned to walk away.

Moonstone closed her eyes and took a deep breath, taking a moment to push and stretch the energy within her before she summoned it. She could feel the water rushing beneath the ground, collected in a reservoir for her use.

The sky was dark above now, the sun having dipped below the horizon. She lightly stepped forward, her arms sweeping slowly around her. She focused on the cool wind, the sharp scent of the snowy forest they had built her training base in.

For a moment she held herself still, frozen in her pose, breathing and listening.

With a deep breath, she begun her dance. She twirled around the training field, light on her toes, flexing her power over the water beneath her. She could hear it crackle as it was caught by her influence and surged through the vented floor at her command.

Only when she had reached the other side of the field did she open her eyes, taking another deep breath before turning to look back at what she had created.

Across the training field, ice twisted up in intricate loops toward the sky. It dipped and wove around itself as if it had danced with her.

Moonstone walked to the nearest pillar of ice and pressed her hand against it. It shimmered and reflected the moonlight that now washed over the field, singing with that strange hum that ice seemed to have.

Moonstone glared at the ice, clenching her fist. The ice grew colder, crackling as it's clarity giave way to a dense, white.

Onyx had been awed at Moonstone's power over ice. Moonstone wondered if Onyx had met any other elemental gems during her short lifetime. Elementals were a rarity, it's possible she didn't.

_It could of been an elemental that killed her._

The ice crackled dangerously at the thought. Moonstone needed to stop getting attached to her trainees.

Moonstone stepped back, releasing her fist, and dispelled the ice. It melted quickly and disappeared into the reservoir below. She couldn't leave it to melt naturally here, where the chilled air kept it frozen solid.

It took a moment for Moonstone to notice the sound of slow clapping over the sound of the water rushing back through the vents. She turned stiffly, not in the mood for visitors. Her frown only deepened as she recognized the gem that stood at the edge of the platform.

"Always impressive, Moonie."

Moonstone willed herself to stay calm at the false, mocking affection that rolled of the newcomer's tongue.

"May I help you Marble?" Moonstone gritted out, moving to leave. She did not have the energy to deal with Marble right now. "I have work to get to."

Marble simply smiled wide at her, her sharp canines shining in the moonlight.

"I actually have some questions I need to ask you, Moonie." She swiped her tongue across her teeth, then leaned in as if to tell a secret. "From the higher ups, y'know?"

Moonstone stilled, turning back toward Marble. Marble was an investigator, and interrogator. Her job was to find traitors and silence them. Moonstone swallowed harshly.

"Why, what kinds of questions?" Moonstone asked, her voice guarded.

Marble smiled, reveling in the power she currently held over Moonstone. She was a vain gem, too proud and too loud, and for some reason, Moonstone had caught her ire. Maybe it was because of her gem type.

Elementals were always watched closely, always handled carefully. Moonstone could still remember the weight of her supressers on her wrists. Cold and metal, the cuffs prevented her from using her power untill she had proven herself loyal to Homeworld. She could still remember the sudden emptiness whenever her trainer activated them, the feeling of some sort of personal loss.

"Just somethin' about one of your trainees." Marble smirked as she studied her nails, leaning against the wall behind her.

Moonstone sighed and walked up in front of Marble, crossing her arms and giving her an expectant look.

"It seems," Marble paused, her eyes flickering up to meet Moonstone's, "that one of your old students went and jumped ship."

Moonstone went stiff. "Jumped ship as in...?"

"Jumped ship as in betrayal." Marble cut in, her voice sharp and her eyes steely.

Moonstone felt a shiver run up her spine. She had never been the subject of Marble's questioning, but she was starting to see why she had gotten her job, however.

"Who?" Moonstone searched her mind desperately, who would it of been? Had there been signs?

"An Ivory, Facet....uh." Marble paused and scrunched up her face. "Facet-7S2E, uh.. Cut-9..YS." Marble smiled wide, pleased with herself. Her eyes watched Moonstone with a cold gaze. "Remember that one?"

"Ivories don't betray." Moonstone said incredulously.

Ivories were almost always assassins and spies. They were cold, calculating, and dangerous. They were supposed to be incorruptible. Once given an order, an Ivory would die to complete it. Moonstone had only trained a few ivories, but she had known others. She had never heard of an ivory going against their orders, against their training.

Moonstone froze. _Their training._

Marble watched her peice it together, an eerie smile splitting across her face.

"You think I trained an ivory to betray?" Moonstone said, her voice low and unbelieving.

They thought she was a traitor, a spy. Moonstone knew the cost of betrayal. Being shattered was one of the kinder things they could do to you. She suddenly felt claustrophobic. Everything was too hot and too close.

Moonstone stifled the flare of power burning under her skin. She needed to calm down. Marble smirked as the air condensed around them, their breaths coming out in little white puffs. Moonstone needed to calm down.

Marble laughed suddenly, pushing herself off the wall. Moonstone shrunk back as Marble moved closer to her, a little too close for Moonstone's comfort.

"Maybe." Marble gave an exaggerated shrug. "S'not for me to decide. I just have the questions Moonie, you're the one with the answers." Marble said, her grin slipping into more of a sneer as she bent to regard the shorter gem.

Moonstone gave a stiff nod, her arms wrapping around herself as if she was cold.

Ivories **don't** betray. What made this one so different?

 

* * *

  
Moonstone flipped through her holo-display. Ivories don't betray. So why did this one?

It had been about a week since her encounter with Marble, but the tight, clenching fear in her gut refused to leave. If anything, the fact that she hadn't heard anything about it yet was making it worse.

Moonstone scoured all the data she had on the ivory in question. She didn't know what she was looking for, but she looked anyway.

She could vaguely remember the Ivory in question. It had been so long ago, toward the beginning of her stay at earth. Moonstone had no idea why this Ivory joined the rebels.

Moonstone clenched her fist and the tiny fountain in her office froze, swirling into graceful arcs. She unclenched and it fell back into water. It had become a nervous habit of hers. Too much nervous energy and her power burned under her skin.

Her other hand swiped through her notes on Ivory. She became lost in the pattern of it.

_Clench, read, swipe, release._

The door to her office slid open with a hiss, but Moonstone was too focused on the info-display to notice.

_Clench, read, swipe, release._

She had to be missing something. What if Ivory had been a traitor from the start. Had there been signs? What if there were traitors among her new students?

_Clench, read, swipe, release._

Something fierce twisted in her chest. She couldn't protect them on the battle field, but she could protect them here. She could.

_Clench, read, swipe, rel.._

"Moonst.. I mean uh.. M'am?"

Moonstone jumped and the frozen fountain shattered.

Chalcedony gasped and stepped back. "I'm so sorry m'am." Chalcedony tripped slightly as she back peddled. "I'll just leave you to.." She waved stifly at Moonstone's info-display.

Moonstone tried to give a reassuring smile as she mentally kicked herself. Chalcedony's hands were shaking. Moonstone had scared the poor gem.

She shoved herself up from her desk

"No, no, you're fine." She said gently. Her hands spread wide in a non threatening display. "You just startled me. I was just reading some reports and..." Moonstone trailed off.

For a moment, the two gems just stared at each other. Awkward silence settled between them, the uncomfortable prickle of it making Moonstone's shoulders stiff.

Moonstone took a deep breath, forcing the stress of the day out of her mind. Her student must have a problem, and unlike the Ivory problem, this might be one she could fix.

"I'm sorry Chalcedony, you caught me at a bad time." Moonstone said, giving her student an apologetic smile. "There have been some... complications.. with the war effort recently. It's left me a little frazzled."

The tension in Chalcedony's body leaked out slowly now that she knew she was not the reason of Moonstone's frustration.  
"I'm sorry I bothered you m'am." Chalcedony mummered. "I'll just leave you." She jerked her thumb toward the exit and made to leave.

"Hold on a second." Moonstone called.

Chalcedony froze, her eyes wide as she turned back toward Moonstone.

"You came here for a reason. What do you need help with?"

Chalcedony looked like she was going to object, but Moonstone quieted her with a wave.

"I could use the distraction." She chuckled softly. "What do you need?"

Chalcedony stared at her feet for a moment, worrying her lip.

"I..uh.. I know I'm not..you know". Chalcedony guestured lamely toward herself. "I was wondering if there might be any extra training I might...."

Chalcedony suddenly looked up. Her eyes met Moonstone's and Moonstone was struck by the vulnerability in them.

"I just..." Chalcedony looked away. "I want to be useful."

Moonstone felt a sharp stab of sympathy for the gem.

"I'm sure we could work something out." She said softly.

Chalcedony's eyes snapped back to hers, her mouth stretching into a wide, beautiful smile.

"Thank you." Chalcedony breathed, her eyes bright and joyful. "I won't let you down."

Moonstone just gave a nod as Chalcedony turned to leave. She sat back down, sighing. She would do everything she could to prepare her students for war.

Moonstone could only hope it worked.

 


	2. Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to get out a chapter a week, but school has been awful as finals get closer.

Moonstone watched Chalcedony closely as she circled her. Chalcedony was stiff, her eyes wide as she clutched the staff in her hands. The training day was over and only Moonstone and Chalcedony were left.

They had only had three extra training sessions so far. Each one had ended with Chalcedony stumbling back to the barracks, exhausted and frustrated with her own lack of ability.

Moonstone sympathized with the gem. Chalcedony knew she was weaker than most and had been putting in the extra effort to keep up with the rest of the class. Moonstone was more than happy to spend the time with Chalcedony, anything to keep another name off the fatalities.

Moonstone twirled her weapon, a handle that contained water and could split in two.  
"Today we will work on your dodging and parrying." Moonstone said, circling back to the front of Chalcedony. "I'm going to try and hit you. Your job is to go as long as possible without that happening."

Chalcedony cringed, her eyes wide at the prospect of getting hit by Moonstone's blows.

Moonstone smiled gently. "Don't worry, we will start slowly."

Chalcedony huffed before getting into position again, her staff held at the ready. Moonstone willed the water out of both sides of the handle, freezing it into a staff of her own.

Moonstone slipped smoothly into a fighting stance, tilting her head in question at Chalcedony. Chalcedony gave a curt nod and Moonstone lunged forward. She made her strikes wide and easy to predict, giving clipped commentary on Chalcedony's performance.

Moonstone itched to correct each mistake she saw, but knew she couldn't overwhelm the gem. Too much information and Chalcedony wouldn't be able to focus on the basics.

Chalcedony lasted a few hours before she started to droop in her stance out of exhaustion. Moonstone slowly dropped the intensity of the lesson before calling it to an end. She didn't want Chalcedony to ingrain errors brought on by exhaustion.  
Chalcedony gave a tired smile when she called the training to an end and went to put the staff back.

Moonstone watched her go before dispelling her weapon.

* * *

  
"Get out of my way!"

Moonstone watched one of the amethysts throw herself at the Sard's shield. Moonstone allowed herself a small smile when the Sard deftly shifted her shield to accommodate the collision.

Today they were split into teams. One team was defensive, the other offensive. The offensive team was supposed to destroy the 'generator' inside the defensive team's base. The defensive team had to stop them.

Moonstone had frozen together a rough structure to serve as a base for the defensive team. She had even frozen twisting 'trees' to create a landscape around it.

"Time ends in two minutes!" Moonstone yelled out to the sparring gems.

The amethyst gave a yell of frustration before throwing her weapon, a maul, at Sard. Sard expertly tilted her shield and deflected the blow.

A bolt of energy blasted toward the Amethyst, who barely had time to dodge. Moonstone glanced toward the other Amethyst, who had knocked Chalcedony back and had taken the chance to get a hit in on the other Amethyst.

Chalcedony staggered back to her feet, gripping tight to her twin swords. She caught Moonstone's gaze and a frown twisted her face before she leaped back at the amethyst, pigtails bobbing.

"One minute remaining."

The amethyst facing Sard yelled her frustration into the air. She reached up to her shoulder and pulled a glowing weapon from it.

The glowing weapon solidified into what looked like a halibut. The Amethyst had just summoned her weapon for the first time.  
Sard dropped her shield, shocked. Moonstone watched as the sard stepped forward with a smile, probably to congratulate the amethyst. Amethyst seemed to not realize what she had just done however, throwing herself at Sard, weapon high.

Moonstone stiffened, reaching for her power to somehow block the attack. The weapons given to the trainees were designed to hurt, but not seriously injure them. Amethyst could kill Sard if she hit her in the right place.

The axe-like weapon swung down. Sard jerked back in surprise, trying to raise her shield again. Moonstone jerked her arm roughly, summoning ice to entrap the amethyst.

Both her and Sard were too slow to stop the attack. The halibut sliced deep between Sard's neck and shoulder before the ice was able to drag Amethyst up and away.

Moonstone ran onto the field, catching Sard just as the larger gem started to slump to the ground. She grit her teeth at Sard's weight as she layed the gem down softly.

Sard gapped up at her with wide eyes, her hands fluttering around where the blade cut into her. The halibut disapeared into a glow of purple.

Moonstone quickly scanned the damage done. Cool relief flooded into her when she saw that the blow had come nowhere near Sard's gem.

"Sard." Moonstone kept her voice calm and low. "You are going to be f.."

Sard poofed into an orange cloud before she could finish her sentence. Moonstone snatched her gem out of the air before it could hit the ground.

"Oh no..." Moonstone glanced up to see Chalcedony standing above her, her hands clasped over her mouth in horror.

Moonstone stood up, cradling the orange-red gem carefully. A whimper drew her attention up toward the amethyst trapped in her ice. The amethyst was staring wide-eyed at where Sard had been, tears dripping down her cheeks.  
Moonstone heaved a heavy sigh before dispelling the ice holding the amethyst captive. The amethyst fell to the ground, hair soaked with melted ice.

"I'm...so sorry, I...I didn't mean.." The amethyst choked out between sobs.  
Moonstone hushed the crying gem gently, shifting Sard's gem to one hand. She reached out to hold Amethyst's hand, like Aventurine had done for her.

She wondered how this amethyst would fare in a war, where so many would be destroyed. Moonstone wished she didn't have too.

"She is going to be fine, Amethyst." She mummered, squeezing the gem's hand.

Moonstone took a breath. "Training is dismissed for the day, go back to the barracks and rest." She called out to the rest of the gems.

* * *

  
After making sure Sard was looked after and Amethyst was alright, Moonstone returned to the training field.  
She leaned against the outer railing and watched the snowbirds flit back and forth between the tree branches.  
Moonstone heard footsteps behind her and turned her head in greeting. She saw lavender in her peripheral vision: Chalcedony.

Chalcedony didn't speak, instead she leaned on the railing next to her and they stood listening to the chittering of the snowbirds.

"What does it feel like?"

Moonstone turned her gaze toward Chalcedony, eyebrows raised. Chalcedony met her eyes for a second before turning back to the forest.

"Getting poofed, I mean."

Moonstone hummed, stretching her power out to the snow covered ground of the forest. Delicate spirals of ice curled out of the snow. With a thought, Moonstone shaped them into what looked like a snowbird.

"It hurts, when you get injured." She mummered, forming another ice-bird next to the first one with a slow twist of her fingers. "Then, everything just, 'pops'. You lose all feeling of the outside world. You can't hear or see anything."

Chalcedony was watching her now, but Moonstone kept her focus on the little sculptures of ice curling out of the snow.

"It's like a dre..." Moonstone caught herself, Chalcedony would never of slept, let alone dream. "You are just stuck in your own head, but you feel physically present." Moonstone scrunched up her face. "Kind of."

Chalcedony was still watching her.

"Have..uh, how many times have you been...?"

Moonstone chuckled. "I'm a couple thousand years old. I've been poofed quite a few times."

"Oh." Chalcedony sighed.

A couple minutes passed in relative silence. Moonstone curled ice around the two birds in an imitation of the nests she had seen them make.

"Those are beautiful." Chalcedony whispered.

Moonstone flushed and hummed her thanks. Her power had always been a tool or a weapon to others. The only other person who appreciated anything else was Aventurine.

"They have always fascinated me." Moonstone drew her finger across the railing, ice trailing behind it. "The birds." She clarified. The ice froze across the metal in the shape of a whispy feather.

"They look so small and fragile." Moonstone looked back up to where the real snowbirds were. "Soft and so breakable, but so vocal and brave."

Moonstone remembered watching a snowbird pluck at a larger bird's tail to distract them. While the larger bird turned, the snowbird snatched up their food and darted away.

"I've seen them be clever and I've seen them play and care about each other." Moonstone watched the little blue and white birds preen each other's feathers. "And they fly so effortlessly." Moonstone laughed. "So freely."

Moonstone turned to Chalcedony, who was watching her with a curious expression on her face. Moonstone blushed and looked away again.

Something about Chalcedony made her drop her guard.  
Moonstone pushed herself off the railing.

"Well, I better get back to work, can't birdwatch all day." Moonstone gave an akward chuckle before heading back to her office.

Chalcedony stayed and watched the birds.

* * *

  
A few weeks later, Chalcedony approached her after her special training, her lips pursed and her face drawn. She stood before Moonstone for a moment, trying to find her words.

Moonstone gave her a gentle smile of encouragement. Chalcedony had improved greatly since she began extra training and Moonstone would be lying if she said she hadn't grown fond of the gem in that time.

"What is war really like?" Chalcedony finally blurted.

Moonstone blinked, she was not expecting that. Chalcedony always had questions. It was one of the reasons Moonstone liked her so much. Moonstone was a teacher through and through, always happy to teach, but Chalcedony had never asked about the war.

"It can be chaos." Moonstone replied slowly. She didn't want to lie to Chalcedony. "That many gems fighting at once."

Chalcedony worried her lip, her eyes darting over to the edge of the base. Beyond it, frost-tipped evergreens spread endlessly.

"Why are we fighting?" Chalcedony said harshly, her mouth pulling into a tight frown.

Moonstone frowned. That was a question she had asked herself many times, especially as Aventurine recounted the death toll to her. All good gems, gone over a stupid planet. She opened her mouth to respond, but Chalcedony cut her off.

"I mean, I know why we are fighting, but I..." Chalcedony trailed off. She was quiet for a moment before her shoulders slumped. "It's just one planet, why can't we just, you know, let the Crystal Gems have it?"

Moonstone stilled. "The... Crystal Gems?"

Chalcedony's eyes snapped up to meet Moonstone's.

"Umm.. I mean, the rebels, you know..." She stuttered, her hands fluttering around her. Chalcedony took a deep breath. "It's, that's just what I've heard they call themselves anyway...." She offered with a weak smile.

Moonstone shoved the ideas of spies and traitors roughly back, a sick feeling settling in her gut. Chalcedony couldn't...

Moonstone gave a rough sigh. "I think it's more the principle than anything." She watched Chalcedony's reaction carefully. She couldn't be.. "These gems have betrayed their own kind for a single planet. To let that kind of betrayal go would only inspire more."

Moonstone paused for a moment. "I just don't understand why gems would betray their own kind, their whole way of life for a single planet."

"Maybe there is more to this planet than we know." Chalcedony said with a soft smile. "Must be really something to be worth all this."

Moonstone's heart clenched at her smile, suddenly struck with the urge to just...take Chalcedony and run. Run away from this war, from everything. She wanted to just gather up the few people she had grown to care about and leave. Take them somewhere safe, where she wouldn't have to send them off to fight a war she knew they wouldn't survive.  
Moonstone had grown resigned to the war, almost numb to it and her place in it, but for some reason Chalcedony dragged all those suppressed emotions back to the surface.

She was angry at Homeworld and the war. The thought of sending her new-found friend off to die in a pointless war made something hot twist in her chest. The thought of a world without little snowbirds singing their nightly song before they settled to sleep. The thought of the rest of her life spent training gems to die for nothing. She had never hated Homeworld so much.  
Suddenly, Moonstone understood why a gem might betray their own.

It made her feel sick.

* * *

 

Moonstone stared at the holo-display before her. It had been months since the new trainees had first arrived and they were almost done with their time here.

They would each go to a specialized trainer to further build on the basics they learned here. She was supposed to submit her professional opinion on where each of her current trainees should go after basic training.

The Red Jasper she had recommended be further trained as 'sheild'. Moonstone and other trainers had long stopped using the technical terms, instead replacing them with a sort of shorthand. A sheild was a defensive, support soldier. They were trained to watch and defend other soldiers around them.

The Red Jasper wielded a shield as if she had come out of the ground with it and was proficient enough with a mace. Combined with her inclination to assist others, a shield seemed to fit her.

One Amethyst and the sard were strikers. The technical term was an offensive attack soldier. They did damage and they did it well, but they suffered in battle awareness. With a shield to watch their back and keep them alive, they would be a force to be reckoned with.

The other amethyst was a scout, a ranged, support soldier. She had struggled with melee weapons, but shined once she was given a ranged once. She had a sharp eye and the accuracy to back it up. As a scout she would watch the battlefield from a distance, relaying information and using ranged weaponry to assist her fellow soldiers. It was not common for such a brawny gem to be a scout, but it was not unheard of.

Moonstone hesitated with Chalcedony. Chalcedony had been making leaps and bounds in her training. If she continued, she would be a fierce opponent, despite her weak start. But Moonstone found herself feeling sick at the idea of Chalcedony in the war. She didn't think she could handle her name on the fatalities list.

Moonstone groaned and dismissed the holo-display with a wave, slumping back in her chair.  
Moonstone had gotten too close to Chalcedony, she knew that. It had started with extra training, but Chalcedony was so eager to learn, and Moonstone loved to teach.

She started teaching Chalcedony about the logistics of battle, then she was teaching her about the structure of the training system. Soon, she was teaching Chalcedony everything from advanced mathematics to musical theory. Everything Moonstone knew, Chalcedony wanted to learn.

Eventually they began to seek each other's company outside of teaching and training. Chalcedony and Aventurine had been teasing and joking with each other within five minutes the first time they met. Moonstone hadn't gotten any work done, but the warm, content feeling in her chest was worth it.

It scared Moonstone how Chalcedony had gotten so close to her so fast. She had spent so long trying to distance herself from others, and along come Chalcedony, able to break through her walls with a smile.  
These past few months made Moonstone realize just how lonely she had been. She'd always had Aventurine, but besides her... Moonstone had no one. Maybe that's why she clung so tightly to Chalcedony.

"Having trouble?"

Moonstone jumped, too deep in her thoughts to hear Aventurine's approach.

"Yeah, it's just...." Moonstone gestured lamely toward the off holo-display.

Aventurine gave a low hum and tapped at the display. She read through it quickly before dismissing it again and turning to give Moonstone a thoughtful look.

"They say the war is getting worse." Aventurine said slowly, watching Moonstone. "They are going to need every soldier they can get right now."

Moonstone huffed and turned away. Why would she say that? Did she want Chalcedony to die?

"It might be worth the trouble of requesting an assistant trainer....." Moonstone jerked her head back to Aventurine, who was trying to keep a smug smile from breaking her facade. "You know, so you could train more gems at once. Maybe Chalcedony woul.."

Moonstone launched herself at her friend. Aventurine gave a small squeak of surprise as Moonstone wrapped the smaller gem up in a hug. Moonstone was laughing as she lifted Aventurine off the ground and spun her. She could save someone. She could save Chalcedony. She would never have to leave, never have to die.

The tight curl of anxiety that had made itself home in her heart began to uncurl and Moonstone didn't even notice the tears dripping down her cheeks.

She could save someone.

She could save her.

She couldn't stop laughing, and Aventurine just laughed alongside her.

* * *

  
_Family._

Chalcedony was leaned against her side, her eyes wide as she watched the sky. Aventurine was lying in the grass in front of them, smiling wide with her head tilted back to watch Chalcedony's reaction to the meteor shower above them.  
Moonstone had not told Chalcedony about the request for her to become Moonstone's teaching assistant. She didn't wat to get her hopes up in case it was denied. Moonstone's stomach curled at the thought.

She was babbling on about the science behind the star streaked sky, watching Chalcedony's awed expression out of the corner of her eye, when the word hit her.

 _Family_.

It hit her hard enough that she sucked in a breath, cutting herself off halfway through a sentence.

_Family._

"Moon?"

Her eyes burned and her chest tightened. Moonstone tilted her head back to keep the tears from spilling out of her eyes, pretending as if she was watching the stars.

The stars used to be a vision of home, but Earth was her home now, with her family.

"Moon?"

The question was more insistent, a hand gripping hers. Moonstone risked a looked down. Chalcedony was no longer watching the sky with wonder in her eyes. She was looking at Moonstone.

"Moonstone? You ok?"

This was ridiculous. Moonstone was thousands of years old, hardened by war and loss. Yet here she was, about to cry because she found a friend.

Found a _family_.

The whispered thought broke her. Chalcedony's grip tightened when Moonstone suddenly let out a choked sob, tears running hot streaks down her face. Aventurine quickly sat up, staring at the scene with wide eyes.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Chalcedony was gripping her hard now. She looked almost scared.

It occured to Moonstone that they were Chalcedony's family as well. Where Moonstone had thousands of years of loves and losses, Chalcedony was new to this world. They were all Chalcedony had.

"Did I do something?" Chalcedony stiffened. "Oh god, I did, didn't I?" She was crying now too.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know what I did but I..."

Moonstone cut her off by burying her face in the crook of her neck, her arms wrapping tight around Chalcedony.  
Chalcedony froze, her words falling into a broken sob.

Moonstone needed to pull herself together. Chalcedony didn't need her baggage. She was supposed to be the teacher, the leader. She was supposed to be strong. Homeworld frowned upon shows of weakness, of emotion.

Chalcedony wrapped her arms around Moonstone, her chin settling on Moonstone's head. Moonstone felt one of Chalcedony's hands cup her head before curling tightly into her hair.

Moonstone was supposed to be strong, but right now she couldn't bring herself to care.

Suddenly, there was another pair of arms around her. The familiar chubby fingers of Aventurine wove their way between her thinner ones.

 _Family_.

* * *

Moonstone woke slowly. She was wrapped in warmth, heavy arms draped over her side, her waist. One of her hands was tangled in something soft. It took her a moment to recognize it as hair.

Moonstone blinked her eyes open. They were still in the field. The night before came back to her in bits and pieces.  
Aventurine was smushed between the two larger gems, her short arms wrapped tight around Moonstone's waist, her face burrowed into her stomach.

Chalcedony's arm was hooked around Moonstone's back, the hand splayed between her shoulder blades. Her other hand was wrapped around the back of Moonstone's neck, hand cupping the back of her skull. Moonstone's own arms were both still around Chalcedony's neck, one hand in her hair, one gripping her shoulder.

They had fallen asleep. On accident.

Moonstone couldn't hold back her laughter. She couldn't even remember the last time she had fallen asleep.

Chalcedony groaned, her grip tightening. Moonstone watched as her eyes blinked sleepily open.  
For a moment, Chalcedony simply just looked around with a confused expression, then her eye shot wide open.

"What happened?" Chalcedony jerked back from Moonstone, stumbling back. Aventurine let out a low groan at the sudden movement.

Chalcedony pulled her knees in to her chest. "What was that?" Her hands ran over her own body, as if to check it was all there.

Moonstone blinked, then almost face palmed when she realized what was going on. Chalcedony had never slept before. It wasn't common for gems to do, not that Chalcedony had ever had the chance.

She was scared, Moonstone realized.

"Hey, you're ok." She mummered, reaching for the panicking gem.

Chalcedony didn't hesitate in grabbing her hand. Moonstone's heart clenched as she realized just how much Chalcedony trusted her.

"That was sleep." Moonstone explained. "It happens when you are tired if you close you eyes and are relaxed enough."

Aventurine shoved herself up with a grumble, her hair wild.

"W'as going on?" Aventurine mumbled, blinking tired eyes at the two other gems. A moment passes where the two gems just stared back.

Moonstone burst out laughing again. Aventurine had never been good at the 'waking up' part of sleep. Before she knew it, Chalcedony had started to laugh too. Aventurine just continued to stare dumbly back, her brows drawn in confusion.  
They were all fine. Everything was going to be fine.

Moonstone laughed until tears were in her eyes and her body ached. She fell back onto the grass, Chalcedony following suit. Chalcedony's hand found hers. The chittering of snowbirds filled the morning air.

"Oh har-de-har." Aventurine grumbled, flopping face down back to the ground.

They were going to be just fine.


	3. Reality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick little chapter in the middle of finals

Moonstone knew something was wrong as soon as she stepped into the briefing room. The air was tense and silent. Moonstone felt her blood run cold when she saw Emerald staring down at Aventurine with steely eyes. Aventurine was stiff and hunched, avoiding her gaze.

As soon as the door slid closed behind Moonstone, Emerald's eyes locked on to her. Moonstone stiffened and stood at attention.

"My Emerald?"

Emerald was the top ranking officer at this training base. She was Moonstone's direct superior. Moonstone inwardly cursed.

"Moonstone." Moonstone managed not to flinch at Emerald's clipped tone. "You need to have better control over your Aventurine. She has proven to be unable to recognize her superiors. How can we expect you to train obedient soldiers when you can't even control your own Aventurine?"

Moonstone took a deep breath, shooting what she hoped looked like a disapproving look in Aventurine's direction.

"I apologize for my Aventurine, my Emerald." Emerald's eyes narrowed. "I assure you, she will be taught the error of her ways."

For a moment, the room sat in heavy silence. Emerald cleared her throat.

"Now that this matter has been dealt with, we can move on to something actually worth our time." The last bit was said directly toward Aventurine.

Moonstone moved to sit at her place. She ignored the apologetic look Aventurine shot her way. Moonstone thanked the stars that it was just her and Emerald in this meeting, not the whole compound.

"Your report." Emerald clasped her hand in front of her, leaning slightly toward Moonstone. "Go over it with me."  
Moonstone took a breath.

"One defensive support soldier: Red Jasper, facet-7J9C cut-5TC. Aptitude with shield. Tendacy to assist fellow soldiers." 

Moonstone could remember the first day, how Red Jasper had helped Chalcedony through the course, even though it slowed her down. Red Jasper became the mother-hen of the trainees, always ready to help her friends. Moonstone hoped it didn't get her killed.

"Two offensive attack soldiers: Amethyst, Facet-3S6A Cut-6WC. Aptitude with meelee weaponry. Ability to see weaknesses in enemies." 

It took so long to get Amethyst to even pick up a weapon after the incident with Red Jasper, how she had hugged and sobbed into the newly reformed Jasper.

"Sard, Facet-3S6A Cut-6WC. Aptitude with heavy weaponry. Shows superior strength." 

Sard had a hearty sense of humor and a loud laugh. She could somehow always know how to cheer up someone who was having a bad day.

"One ranged support soldier: Amethyst facet-1D3H cut-7HT. Adept with ranged weaponry. Superior battle awareness."

That Amethyst was soft spoken and kind. Her eyes were sharply intelligent.

None of them wanted to be soldiers. They never said anything, but Moonstone saw it. Each batch of trainees was like this. They would try to hide the fear in their eyes whenever Moonstone spoke of war, but she always saw it.

One Amethyst loved to sculpt. Moonstone had sat for hours each day after the incident with Red Jasper, watching Amethyst carve intricate designs into the trees as a form of therapy. She had wanted to carve in Moonstone's ice, but Moonstone knew she would only have to destroy it before the next training period. Moonstone wanted the carvings to last.

But she would never be a sculptor, she would live, and most likely die, as a soldier, and Moonstone would have to live with her part in that.

"And the..." Emerald swiped through her holo-display. "Chalcedony. You have requested she be placed under your charge."

Moonstone swallowed. She may not be able to save the other trainees from the war, but she could save Chalcedony.

"Yes, my Emerald." Moonstone kept her tone calm and placid. "She has shown aptitude in teaching and I thought she would make a good assistant. With her, I would be able to increase the amount of gems I could train at once."

Emerald hummed, scanning over her report.

"And if that request is denied, what would you recommend for her placement?"

Moonstone's chest ached, but she kept her composure.

"Offensive support soldier, my Emerald." Emerald watched her as if waiting for her to continue. "She shows great battle awareness and superior dexterity."

Emerald nodded, typing something on her screen.

"That's all Moonstone, you.." Emerald shot a glare at Aventurine. "And your Aventurine, may go."

Moonstone gave a quick bow before standing to go. With a quick pace, she made her way back to her office. Aventurine stayed quiet the whole walk back.

"I'm sorry." Aventurine blurted as Moonstone reached for the door to her office.

Moonstone sighed and opened the door, guesturing the smaller gem inside. Aventurine sat in her normal seat opposite Moonstone's, her eyes downcast.

"What did you say?"

Aventurine scowled. "Nothing really, just forgot I wasn't supposed to, you know, be a person."

Moonstone crossed over to her friend, sitting in the chair next to her.

"But you are." Moonstone slipped her hand into Aventurine's. "It's wrong they expect you to not be."

Aventurine huffed, but squeezed Moonstone's hand anyway.

Moonstone frowned at her friend, trying to think of a way to cheer her up.

"Do you..... want to go out and explore the forests some more today?"

Aventurine laughed. "Is that my punishment?"

Moonstone smirked. "It can be, if you want."

Moonstone stood, pulling Aventurine with her. "Nothing can be worse than having to follow me and Chalcedony around as we faun over. Each. Individual. Leaf."

Aventurine laughed as Moonstone moved closer with each word, her eyes wide in fake-horror.

It had become an inside joke between the three of them: Moonstone and Chalcedony dragging the smaller gem through the forest, chasing each new thing they saw. Aventurine would always have to drag them back when they had work to do, smiling as she complained about how they would get nothing done without her there to keep them on track.

So with a smile back on her friends face, Moonstone went in search of Chalcedony.

 

* * *

 

"Do you know how to dance?"

Moonstone glanced up from the white feather she had found while wondering the forest. Chalcedony was watching her with a curious expression, shuffling her feet in the fallen pine needles.

"I know how to, but it's not a common practice among gems." Moonstone responded slowly. "Why?"

Chalcedony laughed awkwardly, wringing her hands.

"I know how to, kinda. I learned at the uhh.." Chalcedony looked away, frowning. "The kindergarten. The kindergarten, yeah." Chalcedony looked back, her smile a little forced.

Moonstone opened her mouth to ask Why they had taught her how to dance at a kindergarten, but Chalcedony cut her off.

"Would you like to?" Chalcedony blurted with a blush.

Moonstone blinked. Homeworld frowned upon dancing with others. Moonstone was not sure why it had become so taboo in the first place. She had not danced with someone else for... a very long time. Moonstone found herself very much wanting to change that.

Moonstone glanced at Aventurine, who had taken a seat on a fallen log. The smaller gem looked nervous at the turn of the conversation. A little spark of rebellion flared in her chest. They were in the woods, no one would know if they danced. 

Moonstone only ever danced now as a way of mourning these days, twisting ice around herself with the faces of dead students behind her eyelids. She wanted to dance for joy instead.

Chalcedony bit her lip. "I thought it might be something I could teach you. But I guess.." Chalcedony trailed off, glancing down. "If you don't want to.."

Moonstone chuckled softly, holding her hands out to the other gem. Her stomach fluttered with nervous energy. "Sure, let's dance."

Chalcedony looked up with wide eyes, her face breaking into a beautiful smile. Moonstone blushed when the shorter gem quickly walked over and grabbed both her hands. They stood for a moment, just holding each other's hands. 

Chalcedony's face scrunched. "I.. Uh..We don't have music."

Moonstone laughed, shifting Chalcedony's hands to her waist and shoulder. Once properly situated, Moonstone began to hum.

The dancing was slow, with Chalcedony constantly missing a step or stumbling, but Moonstone continued on. Eventually, Chalcedony's initial stiffness wore off and the dance picked up speed. Moonstone's humming broke into a laugh when Chalcedony tripped into her, but they kept dancing.

Chalcedony eventually started to laugh with her, her hands sliding back onto Moonstone's. They began to spin, laughing as they spun around each other, clinging to each other's hands. Chalcedony's eyes were closed, her head thrown back in laughter. 

Tears pricked at the edges of her eyes. Moonstone felt warm with happiness, her heart felt like it might burst with it. Moonstone could have this. She could be happy, finally happy. 

Moonstone stopped laughing abruptly when she felt it. Familiar energy pulsed in her gem, her form starting to flood with it.

She let go.

Both her and Chalcedony fell back into the snow. Moonstone quickly ran her hands over her own body, making sure she was still all there. Chalcedony was still laughing, moving her arms around in the snow, unaware of the sudden change in mood. Moonstone sat up and looked over at Aventurine, who had gotten up from her seat on a log. Moonstone's own horror reflected in Aventurine's eyes.

Chalcedony's laughter trailed off as she sat up. Moonstone quickly forced a smile onto her face.

"That was awesome!" Chalcedony had tears in her eyes from laughing. "I didn't know dancing could be so.." Chalcedony waved her hands around, trying to convey her meaning, before giving up and bursting into laughter again.

"Yeah.." Moonstone ran her hand over her gem.

Hands landed on her shoulders. Moonstone looked up to see Aventurine, wearing a carefully schooled, calm expression. 

"Welp. It's about time for us to head on back." Aventurine chirped, her smile strained.

Chalcedony's smile dropped slightly, her head tilting in confusion.

"Um.. Yeah, ...Ok"

Both Moonstone and Chalcedony stood up from the snow. Moonstone clutched her arms close her instead of helping Chalcedony up, which is what she would of usually done. She couldn't bring herself to touch the other gem. Not after that.

The walk back was uneventful and quiet. Chalcedony eventually caught on to the tense air, wrapping her arms around herself self-consciously as they walked in silence back to the base.

Moonstone understood why dancing was frowned upon now.

 

* * *

 

Aventurine shut the door quickly, taking a deep breath before turning around to face Moonstone.

"What was that?" The smaller gem hissed, the neutral expression that had sat on her face the whole walk back dropping into one of panic.

Moonstone wrung her hands. What was that? Moonstone had fused before, but it had been thousands of years ago. It had been when she had still been a soldier, back when it was expected of her. It had never been through dancing. This felt different, warmer and...

"I.. It was.." Forbidden. Fusing with different types of gems was forbidden. A crime worthy of being shattered over. They could get away with dancing in the woods, but not fusion.

"Moon, what was that?" Aventurine repeated.

Moonstone swallowed. "I don't know, it wasn't purposeful.. I just.."

Aventurine let out a frustrated sound, pacing over to the desk.

"That was..." Aventurine faltered. "That, what you almost just did. That's..."

Moonstone buried her face in her hands. "I know, Venny, I know! I didn't know we could.. That it would.." She threw her hands down in frustration. 

"I just wanted to be happy, to forget for once. I didn't know we could FUSE from dancing together."

Aventurine's face twisted in sympathy. With a heavy sigh she ran her hand down her face.

"Well you didn't, you know, so... Everything is fine anyway." Aventurine pulled a chair out from the desk and slumped down into it. "Just no more dancing, Ok?"

Moonstone traced her gem with her finger, remembering the warmth of those moments before she let go, the feeling of belonging.

"Yeah, no more dancing..."

 


End file.
